Doctor,,,, Doctor....

Doctor! Doctor! I think I'm shrinking!!

Now, now, now, settle down.....You'll just have to be a little patient.

Doctor, Doctor my son has swallowed my pen, what should I do?

Use a pencil until I get there

Doctor, Doctor I think I'm a bell?

Take these and if it doesn't help give me a ring!

Doctor, Doctor I think I'm suffering from Deja Vu!

Didn't I see you yesterday?

Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pack of cards. 

I'll deal with you later.

Doctor, Doctor Have you got something for a bad headache?

Of course. Just take this hammer and hit yourself in the head. Then you'll have a bad headache.

Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking there is two of me

One at a time please

Doctor, Doctor will this ointment clear up my spots?

I never make rash promises!

Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I�m invisible

Who said that?

Doctor Doctor I feel like a racehorse.

Take one of these every 4 laps!

Doctor, Doctor I think I'm a dog.

How long have you felt like this?

Ever since I was a puppy!

Doctor, Doctor When I press with my finger here... it hurts, and here... it hurts, and here... and here... What do you think is wrong with me?

You have a broken finger!

Doctor Doctor I feel like biscuits!

What, you mean those square ones?

Yes!

The ones you put butter on?

Yes!

Oh, You're Crackers!

Doctor, Doctor I feel like a pair of curtains

Well pull yourself together then

Doctor, Doctor I snore so loud I keep myself awake

Sleep in another room then!

Doctor, doctor my baby's swallowed a bullet 

Well don't point him at anyone until I get there!

Doctor, Doctor I'm becoming invisible.

Yes I can see you're not all there!

Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm a frog

What's wrong with that 

I think I'm going to croak 

Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm a vampire.

Necks please!

Doctor, Doctor my sister thinks she is a lift!

Well tell her to come in

I can't she doesn't stop at this floor!

Doctor, Doctor, everyone keeps ignoring me. 

Next please!

Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm a dog.

Sit on the couch and we will talk about it.

But I'm not allowed up on the couch!

Doctor, Doctor I'm a burglar!

Have you taken anything for it?

Doctor, Doctor I've lost my memory!

When did this happen?

When did what happen?

Doctor, Doctor I feel like a dog!

Sit!

Doctor, Doctor I feel like a needle.

I see your point!

Doctor, Doctor You've got to help me - I just can't stop my hands shaking

Do you drink a lot?

Not really - I spill most of it!

Doctor, Doctor I think I'm a bridge

What's come over you?

Oh, two cars, a large truck and a coach.